Slothlands Academy for Girls
The Old School House
Birchingem

Headmaster: Edmund Master P(erve) Hons.

MEMO TO: MR. A.SQUIFFINGON-SMYTHE

RE: ACADEMY PLAY.

Thank you for your memo with your ideas surrounding the end of term play. I note with satisfaction the extremely perverted nature of your suggestions. (You did go to private school obviously)

I will leave the final choice up to you. Just as long that there are a lot of girls dressing up and parading themselves, frankly I don’t give a Sloth’s left bollock.

Incidentally, are you prepared to run the Friday film club? I’ve seen in your study and you appear to be a real film buff. At least, I’ve seen you watching your films in the buff. My personal favourite is “Bandy Mandy and the Randy Handyman spank Sandy and Candy” A little-known classic.

Ed Master.