the role of punishment

[Ozme52]

As sirtacit already said, I see that there are some different points of view from different people, so it is a really usefull topic to discuss
I also see that the way punishment is experienced differs for different subs and Doms so it is important to understand eachother well.

So I think that if there is a need to punish a sub in a way that he or she doesn't enjoy, obviously the sub did something to upset his/her Dom(me) and there may have been some miscommunication when discussing what both of you want out of your play.


I am not saying a child should enjoy their punishment when bad, but the first reason for doing bdsm is because you enjoy it, so I prefer punishment to be used in the sense of roleplay, being secretely enjoyed by the sub.


I don't have experience with punishing someone else myself, but I think this answers the question how I would use punishment or how I prefer to be punished.

Anyway it is interesting to see all your thoughts about punishments

This belies that you aren't using the word 'punishment' in the same way as virtually everyone else in the lifestyle.

There is discipline and order to be gained from the lifestyle, which creates opportunities to make mistakes or be disobedient... and hence punishment.

If it's part of the play, and we DO play, we're not suggesting otherwise, but if is part of playing, it is not really punishment.

I spank because I enjoy it. I spank because she enjoys it. Spanking is never about punishing her for a misdeed.

[annie]

This belies that you aren't using the word 'punishment' in the same way as virtually everyone else in the lifestyle.

There is discipline and order to be gained from the lifestyle, which creates opportunities to make mistakes or be disobedient... and hence punishment.

If it's part of the play, and we DO play, we're not suggesting otherwise, but if is part of playing, it is not really punishment.

I spank because I enjoy it. I spank because she enjoys it. Spanking is never about punishing her for a misdeed.

Exactly... i agree with Oz and to muddy the waters even further, I learned recently that apparently for me (currently) there is "punishment" which is for a willful act of wrong that i did and "correction" which is the removal of a right for something that was not willful but still not acceptable either. Personally, I see both as "punishment" with one not being as severe at the other. Although I know 2 people who would disagree with me on that definition! Either way I don't see either of those as "play." Play is fun and lighthearted. Punishment or correction gives a sinking almost sick feeling in the pit of the stomach at the thought that one has disappointed for whatever reason.