desdemona, i am so glad that you started this thread. i feel as if i have always known. i was only 7 years old when i saw an image of a little girl, tied naked to a tree crying. i wanted to be her, the feeling was so overwhelming that i can still clearly remember the image, and how i felt at that moment. To know that feeling of helplessness. i have also always fantasized about being taken. i imagined being kidnapped, bound, spanked, and used. i spent many years afraid of my thoughts and feelings...never allowing myself to share them with another living soul (not even my best friend), until a couple of years ago when i found an alternative dating site, and found that i was far, very far, from being alone in my thoughts and feelings. i have learned to embrace my dark side, and my perversions...it is who i am.

i was also like restrainedNtrained, and was always the one that was serving, and getting used...still find it hard to say NO...although i am learning.

i have often wondered how others knew as well...what was that moment, was it an image, or something someone said or did? It really is cool to find out how others realized that they were submissive or Dominant.