Well of course. A person should behave while around other people period (bdsm or not). I can't think of any scenario where respect is not present. Even in the midst of your enemies, you should always have respect for someone. That shows that you have self control. If this sub acted a mess in front of this many people she must be a mess in her vanilla lifestyle as well. No one should act like that. It's not even cute. And the person (most likely female) who came up with the idea that this kind of playful banter was cute deserves the chopping block. But what happened was she probably thought that what she was doing was 'cute teasing', which very VERY few people can get away with without becoming annoying. Most people think I'm the most 'adorable adult' they've ever come across (and they think it's even more adorable when I act my age) but if I tried something like this, I'd be dismissed in a quick second. And I'd dismiss (and have dismissed in the past) anyone who tried it with me.

So no excuse. Don't invite her over any time soon. This kind of person ruins get-togethers.