[QUOTE=thir;752801]It is my impression that switch or powershifter profiles are very very different from each other. Some I know do in fact shift according to gender. Others, however, may shift according to their relationships, or after which side people pull at..

Quite a few I know have been subs for years, and then, for some reason unaccountable to themselves, shift to dominance.

i feel this way because a submissive is a submissive and it is ingrained in your personality, just as a Dom is a Dom...[/]

Many people say this, but why? I do not doubt for a moment that this is how it is for you, but why should it be like that for everybody?



Puuh, here I was confused..
OK, trying to sort my thoughts out it out a bit..First, there are many ways in BDSM, some are Ds orientated and some are not. It is a very wide field with lots and lots of variations, and none is 'the right way'. 'The Right Way' is individual, which is to say the way that makes that individual or these people happy.

It does not make sense otherwise, does it??? Or else, who gets to say which is right on behalf of all? And does it not matter whether or not they are happy?

It seems to me that if you break out of the straight and narrow ways of mainstream society, there is no point in running headlong into another set of rules set by others!

Secondly, what also confused me was that the 'just in it for the fun of it and not for what D/s really means' bit sounds like Ds is not fun! That isn't what you mean, is it??

Comments are welcome, I realize I am not quite with you here..



Does this mean that your submissiveness is related to gender? What I mean is, that you are sub to men but Dom to women? Or do you mean that dominating women doesn't count as being dominant?

Sounds like a familiar profile, but doesn't that clash with your concept of being sub through and through??
oh boy

sorry...i should have been clearer. i soOo hate to be misunderstood, or to misunderstand others. when i said i am submissive through and through, i guess i was only thinking about it in terms of my sexuality, which means, FOR ME, i could only love a man, never a woman, and could only submit to a man, and never a woman. i know this deep down inside. that is not to say i would ever look down on someone for 'being a switch', and i don't think i indicated that, but if i gave that impression, i certainly apologize.

of course dominating a woman 'counts' as being dominant, although i would make a terrible Domme because i would not be interested in nurturing my girl, i would just use her sexually and be done with her. of course, that was all hypothetically speaking, mind you, and who knows what anyone would do in any given situation.

also, i did not say it should be that way for everybody...i mean, take a look around here, people are into all kinds of interesting things and speaking for myself i certainly never judge anyone for their interests or 'kinks' just because they clash with mine or whathaveyou, so please don't think that from my comments.

i also agree there is no 'right way' or 'wrong way'...to each his own, whatever makes you happy, i have no problem with that. and here, again, i agree with you when you say:

there is no point in running headlong into another set of rules set by others!

iin my case, if i were to 'switch', i would be dominant with a woman before i would ever be dominant with a man. i have found that vanilla men are taken with me and they don't know why, and they want to control me because they sense my submissiveness somehow, although they don't know how to deal with it. i think it is ingrained in me, just as switching must be ingrained in people who switch. but i do not act dominant with men...to me for the most part, i instinctively already place men above me, especially Masters and Doms, absoultely just because of who they are. i think that is because the controlling, powerful facet of their personality tugs at the submissive, compliant facet of my personality and the more they take from me, the more i want to give to them, and i view women as equals, so to answer the question, IN MY CASE ONLY, yes, 'switching' would be gender-related.

i hope this helps...please continue to ask if i have not responded to your satisfaction...i don't want to make anyone feel bad