???

[Tempscire]

I'd probably go as far to say that the majority of people in the BDSM lifestyle don't go for it 24/7. You just have to find a level that you're comfortable with and run with it. As has already been said there's no set way to enjoy the BDSM lifestyle. It's such a wonderfully varied and satisfying lifestyle that it will always be what you make of it.

I understand your concerns about how to approach a relationship with BDSM in mind. You don't want a 24/7 thing so that would preclude just looking from a slave on a forum. You're probably going have to go with one of the more mundane routes of getting a girl/boyfriend and then having to subtly find out if they're into the lifestyle at all. From my own perspective I don't think I could ever have a truly vanilla lifestyle ever again, but you may find that anyone you find can fulfil you whether they're into the scene or not.

Best of luck to you anyway

[jeanne]

You're probably going have to go with one of the more mundane routes of getting a girl/boyfriend and then having to subtly find out if they're into the lifestyle at all.

I do not believe this to be true. And frankly, it sounds like a lovely way to drive oneself crazy.

I am not 24/7. To be brutally honest - I did 21 years of marriage. I have no interest in catering to the every whim of a man again on a daily basis.

I have an intense, satisfying D/s relationship with a Dom who I see on a regular basis for a few days at a time. This works for both of us. Outside of that, we chat regularly and have a good friendship.

Do not let anyone tell you that the only 'good' submissive is a 24/7 slave. That the only 'real' BDSMers are the ones who are "on" all the time. That is crap. Whatever level of D/s and/or S/M you want in your life is perfect - for you.