Re-awakening and Confusion

[TimberV]

And I love you back, of course.

I've cried in your lap, slept in your arms, and carry with me a bracelet you and J put on me to remind me of your influence in my life - the depth of our relationship calls for, at the very least, my honesty with you even at the occasional risk of a hurt feeling or two. (Temporary hurt feeling, of course.)

Now, don't think the fact that you're the only Dom on this forum that possesses the power to drop by my house anytime and cane my ass into next week didn't cross my mind, but I decided I'd risk it and be irritatingly forthright regardless...

Is that an invitation? Perhaps I may have to take you up on that.

After a lot of thinking and soul-searching, I realize that one of the things that happened is my awakening process has been happening over the entire year. It wasn't just "LA man." It was more than that. Conversations with Oz & A. Learning again, how much I missed the life. How much I have to offer, both as a Dom and as a sub. When submission is appropriate and when Domination is timely.

I finally had a portion of the conversation with my vanilla partner. Things weren't explained in great detail, but he has made it clear that he is not interested in the lifestyle. I think that the time has come to clear up some of his misconceptions and to also add a bit more detail of what it means to me. Then, I will leave it to him to decide what he wants to do with the information. Tricky ground, but I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say something.

These discoveries don't make the process any easier, but at least I'm able to understand it a little bit better. It's amazing what happens when a person actually quiets the mind.

[DowntownAmber]

Is that an invitation? Perhaps I may have to take you up on that.

That's a standing invitation, of course. My door is always open to you and the session collar is on the hook by the door. I'll even make you dinner beforehand.

After a lot of thinking and soul-searching, I realize that one of the things that happened is my awakening process has been happening over the entire year. It wasn't just "LA man." It was more than that. Conversations with Oz & A. Learning again, how much I missed the life. How much I have to offer, both as a Dom and as a sub. When submission is appropriate and when Domination is timely.

I finally had a portion of the conversation with my vanilla partner. Things weren't explained in great detail, but he has made it clear that he is not interested in the lifestyle. I think that the time has come to clear up some of his misconceptions and to also add a bit more detail of what it means to me. Then, I will leave it to him to decide what he wants to do with the information. Tricky ground, but I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say something.

These discoveries don't make the process any easier, but at least I'm able to understand it a little bit better. It's amazing what happens when a person actually quiets the mind.

I think you're in for a very enlightening next few months, my friend. You'll get to where you need to be.

[Ozme52]

I finally had a portion of the conversation with my vanilla partner. Things weren't explained in great detail, but he has made it clear that he is not interested in the lifestyle. I think that the time has come to clear up some of his misconceptions and to also add a bit more detail of what it means to me. Then, I will leave it to him to decide what he wants to do with the information. Tricky ground, but I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say something.

These discoveries don't make the process any easier, but at least I'm able to understand it a little bit better. It's amazing what happens when a person actually quiets the mind.

Yes, but easier than not discussing it with him and letting your need languish within you.

[Ozme52]

Conversations with Oz & A. Learning again, how much I missed the life. How much I have to offer, both as a Dom and as a sub. When submission is appropriate and when Domination is timely.

I also thought the conversation we had was very enlightening... and all too brief.

There was an interesting underlying connection that I certainly felt. Two old souls perhaps, meeting again for the first time.