leo9: Thanks so much! Your link to the Surrendered Wife website is awesome. I don't think I'm going to buy the book (self-helps books are just SO not my thing), but perhaps showing him the website will help him to understand the way I'm thinking.

VaAugusta: I think he would be a lot more accepting if I announced I was into whips, chains, and gags! As it is, I think he suspects that I'm looking for an "easy out," where I don't have to take on many of the responsibilities he thinks of adults having (financial things especially). I'm uncertain as to how to approach the subject further with him. We've talked about it a little bit, about a month and a half ago, but while he came back to me two days later and said "I understand, and this is something I am willing to do in our relationship," I don't think he really gets it. He's changed his behavior a little, but in kind of... lackluster ways. I dated his close friend for about 10 months, and he seems to be taking cues from the way that friend treated me. Unfortunately, that man did not treat me as I wished to be treated. There's also the problem of us having been such close friends for so long. I don't think he sees a need for romance and mystery, and most of all, impressing me. Should I really just be open and honest with him? It seems as though just blurting out "I want more romantic stuff" not only makes me seem commanding but also needy! I want to figure out a way for him to realize on his own that I want this, and also a way for him to actually want to do it.

Thanks again for everyone's help and kind words!