Astinence-Only Education?

[leo9]

[COLOR="red"]I think it's fine to advocate abstinence as the only sure-fire method of preventing STD's, unwanted pregnancy and the emotional turmoil that can ensue once people engage in sexual intercourse. Nothing else comes with a 100% guarantee.

Unfortunately, neither does this. The figures show that children taught abstinence-only have a slightly *higher* level of underage pregnancies and STDs than those taught conventional sex ed. The best guess is that they do it just as much as any other kids (human nature being as hard to beat as ever,) but because they believe they're not going to, they're not prepared.

Even more sadly, there's a growing number of kids turning up with STDs who swear they haven't had sex. Either you really can catch it off a toilet seat, or what they've been taught isn't abstinence, it's denial.

[Thorne]

Even more sadly, there's a growing number of kids turning up with STDs who swear they haven't had sex. Either you really can catch it off a toilet seat, or what they've been taught isn't abstinence, it's denial.

Just because something is classified as a Sexually Transmitted Disease doesn't mean that sexual intercourse is the only way to get it, does it? It means it's the primary way to get it, but not the only way. Blood transfusions or needles from drug use are other ways to get them. It may also be possible to transfer the disease through manual stimulation of the genitals (petting), which kids may not consider sex when asked about it. And some girls are engaging in anal or oral sex in order to preserve their "virginity" for marriage. Again, would they still consider that as having sex? I know most adults would (except perhaps politicians), but would the kids?

[thir]

Just because something is classified as a Sexually Transmitted Disease doesn't mean that sexual intercourse is the only way to get it, does it? It means it's the primary way to get it, but not the only way. Blood transfusions or needles from drug use are other ways to get them. It may also be possible to transfer the disease through manual stimulation of the genitals (petting), which kids may not consider sex when asked about it. And some girls are engaging in anal or oral sex in order to preserve their "virginity" for marriage. Again, would they still consider that as having sex? I know most adults would (except perhaps politicians), but would the kids?

To the best of my knowledge the only STD you can get by touching is herpes. All the others you have to have sexual contact, including oral or anal. And the kids should informed of these matters.

[Thorne]

To the best of my knowledge the only STD you can get by touching is herpes. All the others you have to have sexual contact, including oral or anal. And the kids should informed of these matters.

And that's the real problem. How can you teach kids that oral or anal sex IS sex without informing them that oral and anal sex exist? How can you teach kids to protect themselves without telling them (or showing them) what to protect themselves against? Yet too many parents are terrified of letting their kids know that there IS such a thing as sex. Far better, they seem to think, that the kids shouldn't even know about it until after they're married. Until then, just pretend it doesn't exist.

That tactic doesn't seem to be working, does it?

[thir]

And that's the real problem. How can you teach kids that oral or anal sex IS sex without informing them that oral and anal sex exist? How can you teach kids to protect themselves without telling them (or showing them) what to protect themselves against? Yet too many parents are terrified of letting their kids know that there IS such a thing as sex. Far better, they seem to think, that the kids shouldn't even know about it until after they're married. Until then, just pretend it doesn't exist.

That tactic doesn't seem to be working, does it?

No, it doesn't. Teaching your kids about these matters is a parent obligation, IMO, just as so many other things you have to teach or prepare for.

As for the teaching the abstinence thing in the revolting manner described, I again wonder if it is possible to first make sex gross and then later accept it? Frankly, I find this kind of thing abusive.

[Thorne]

No, it doesn't. Teaching your kids about these matters is a parent obligation, IMO, just as so many other things you have to teach or prepare for.

I agree, except that there are some points of sexuality and biology that parents are seldom equipped to handle. The basics, sure, but some in-depth facts about reproduction might be better left to qualified teachers. Assuming that your school is willing to hire such teachers.

As for the teaching the abstinence thing in the revolting manner described, I again wonder if it is possible to first make sex gross and then later accept it? Frankly, I find this kind of thing abusive.

I agree completely. I've never understood how people can believe that gaining knowledge is wrong.

[thir]

Either you really can catch it off a toilet seat, or what they've been taught isn't abstinence, it's denial.

You can't.