>When looking for a Dom, go slow. Don't rush into anything and make sure there is a huge amount of communication.

This. A thousand times, this.

While one can hope any partners you find will be decent human beings, you are putting a great deal of trust in them, and they have to respect that- not to mention respect you.

Unfortunately, there are always going to be parasites out there who think that BDSM is a free pass for anything and everything they want to do just because they call themselves a dominant. Anyone worth your time and effort will get to know you and take you and your feelings seriously, though.

So I guess there is a One True Way of BDSM after all, then :P