This thread, The New Domme’s Handbook to Chat-room Survival, is the brainchild of myself and several other Dommes here at the Library. It is intended for those who, as Draco so eloquently put it during one of our discussions, “…[A]re stalked incessantly across the internet just for being Unicorns.”

We have come to realize that there are some pitfalls that new Dommes inevitably fall into when first coming here. Hopefully the following tips and suggestions that I have compiled form our collective experience will be useful to those Dommes who are joining our ranks. And perhaps those who are not new will have some advice to add to this list.

So read on my friends, and leave a nugget of wisdom should you be so inclined.


THE NEW DOMME’S HANDBOOK TO CHAT-ROOM SURVIVAL:

Chapter 1: Why We are Stalked

People who “stalk” Dommes are looking for one or more of the following:

- A Woman to Dom them
- To be able to say they have “turned” a Domme into a female sub
- To be “turned” from Dom into sub
- Or for someone to “train” them

People are of the thought that Female Dominants (Dommes) are a rare breed and as such are something to be coveted and treated as a big game prize…I.e. like unicorns, the most elusive of prey and one that you are more likely to get killed than be successful at capturing it.

Chapter 2: Avoid Using Obviously Domme Names

So how do you deter unicorn hunters? The best way is to avoid using obviously Domme names. Using words like Miss, Mistress, Lady, etc. will quickly identify you as a Domme and often are useful in representing who we are and the self we are presenting.

These words also act like beacons and in some cases that can be a good thing. If you are trying to avoid being obvious, try using a capitol letter to begin your name. Many people in the lifestyle capitalize Dom/me nouns and pronouns and use only lowercase letters to represent submissive nouns and pronouns. For example:

“It belongs to Her.” Vs. “It belongs to her.”
Or

“That is what I thought” vs “That is what i thought”


Chapter 3: Dealing with Unwanted PMs

Once a unicorn hunter realizes you’re a Domme, be prepared for a PM or Whisper….you will be asked questions until you are sick of them and receive requests like “Will you be my Domme” to “Want to scene” to “How do I become a Dom/me” and everything in between.

Everyone has a different style with dealing with unwanted PMs and Whispers. You will need to develop your own method. Some Dommes will not grant permission for PMs. Some will give the permission and then enjoy messing with the hunter’s head (teasing them and the like) and still other’s will try and be nice and simply say that are not interested/available/that desperate or whatever. It is simply a matter of what you’re personal style is.