I started exploring bdsm, I'm really curios, but sort of nervous too?
I'm 18, mostly shy and reserved, raised pretty conservatively, last year in high school, don't stand out a lot, have a hard time just letting go, very self contained. I don't have any bdsm experience, or actually don't have much experience in general. I probably seem pretty vanilla.

The thing is I came across bdsm a while ago, and can't seem to stop going back to it. I find it fascinating, spend ages researching it and reading, and would love to explore. But it was hard to get the courage to post here.
Um, I think i'm a sub, from my few tries a self-bondage, I just can't see myself as a domme. And though I'm a feminist, I feel submissive. Illogical, and confusing, but still.
Anyhow, I'm sort of lost :s