Not really sure this qualifies, but wanted to publish it in honour of its dedicatee, in spite of all its manifold faults

I have no real idea where it came from, except the dark recesses of my mind - it just seemed to write itself on the way home yesterday. So with sincere apologies to the shade of Ira Gershwin, and a good deal of shame at having committed such cheesy lyrics, I thought I would pass it on.

Kneel for me,
My oh-so-spankable you,
Before me,
My un-out-rank-able you!
Just one chat with you, my heart leapt from within me.
You, like no-one else, bring out the Dom within me.
I love all
The nights I sighed about you
Above all
I want soft hide about you
Don't be a naughty cariad,
Come for Colin, come for Colin, do
My oh-so-spankable you!