ok...If I'm not mistaken, I believe I read a somewhere you have a daughter?.? If I am right tell us what you thought, felt the first time you held her. Be as descriptive as possible. Every mother looks their baby over the first time they see their baby....I know I did. I had to touch and look to make sure she was perfect...Give us your experience

This is my second assignment for the writers block. SB had given me this assignment a month back and due to life getting in the way I had a lot of trouble starting. This was also a hard one for me to write because of my personal situation. I decided to do it as a letter to my daughters because maybe someday I can show it to them and they will know how much I loved them from the start.



To My daughter:

I want to tell you about when I first saw you and fell in love with you. I had carried you for nine months, felt you move within me and was closer to you than to anyone before even though we had not met yet. I remember how badly I wanted to see you and how happy I was to feel your life connected so intimately to me.

When I was in labor it was so much work and I did not think I would be able to finish giving birth to you. Suddenly there you were angry, red faced and crying about your abrupt ejection into a cold, bright and loud world. You felt and smelled so good to me when the nurses finally gave you back all cleaned up.

I held you close and ran my hands all over your body from your toes back to the top of your head. I just could not believe you were whole and healthy. I knew you could not really see me very well, yet when I looked at your face for the first time, there was a connection flowing between us that could never be severed.

I kept staring at your face often those first few days, watching you sleep and waiting for you to open your eyes just a little so you could see me smile at you. You were utterly, completely and unconditionally loved from the start. All I wanted to do is to hold you in my arms and keep you safe. When I looked at you I saw all the possibilities of your life before you, your successes and your happiness.

I was also afraid. Afraid that I would not be strong enough to keep you safe, that I would fail you somehow by not deserving the responsibility I chose when you were conceived. I was afraid I would let you down when you needed me and that I would make so many mistakes. I prayed to be able to make wise choices with your future and for the understanding to know what was best for you. I prayed to be strong enough to let you make your own mistakes so you could learn and grow. There was so many things that I wanted to promise to you. To listen and really hear you, to respect your opinions and feelings and to make sure that you knew you were always first in my life.

Most of all I wanted you to know that I would have you again if I had a chance to do it all over. I am blessed by knowing you and every single day that you are alive brings me great happiness. I am humbled to bring into the world someone as wonderful as you are and that you are part of my life. The moment I looked into your eyes and recognized your soul I knew we had met before; our fates will always be entwined. I love you and you are always in my heart.