This is a question for Doms and subs; and sorry this may be a long post but I need to clarify why I am asking this question.

Seeing as I have been invited back to another forum by a good friend, and the reason I had left was because I was getting into too many disputes with other members on certain issues, and got tired of being constantly flamed in private. I did go back and promised to think twice before I post again.
After reading some posts in the other forums this evening and holding back on responding to any of them. I decded to post a question here that has always mystified and intruigued me.

I have been given advice by others that I cannot change my b/f into a Dom.
I may be able to persuade him into a little bit of play, but if my sub tendencies run further than that, I should just learn to suppress them and be happy with what I have. I can understand that and I can make decisions regarding what to do with my life. I don't think that I can fully suppress anything, but for now that is what I have to do.

What I fail to understand is when these people involved in every aspect of the lifestyle, be it play or a Dom/sub relationship say they could give it up in an instant if they had to. I find that kind of an incredible thing to just take what you enjoy, crave, and have done for the majority of your life and just shove it away, without a second thought. They say that they would give it all up for love and sex. And I just don't get it. Was there some sort of distinction between love and sex, and BDSM or a D/s relationship that I have missed?

Here is my question - Would you give up being a Dom or sub for a vanilla realationship, because you found someone who wasn't into that and you really wanted a relationship with them? And also would you be willing to give up any kinky bedroom sex as well? I am just curious to know if you would and why.