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Prisoner of the New Republic Author: Jack Harlequin
(Added on Jun 22, 2014) (This month 30184 readers) (Total 30184 readers)
Mona was 25, beautiful, and happily married. Then everything changed, and she was branded a criminal in the New Republic.

Ratings and Reviews:
Number of Ratings: 3
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Weighed Average (?): (6/10)
Average Rating: (6.5/10)
Highest Rating: (9/10)
Lowest Rating: (4/10)

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Reviewer: Southernsub06 (Edit) Rating: Oct 10, 2014
Very good story but I had trouble following when the point of view changed or when the dialogue changed from talking to thinking. I liked the plot and the ideas presented in the story. (9/10)

Reviewer: JimmyJump (Edit) Rating: Jul 28, 2014
Good idea, badly executed. Story starts off well though, with decent descriptions of Mona's panic attacks.
The addition of the rape threats, made by leering stereotypes is a telltale sign of where things are gonna go: South.
Once we get to the hypnosis part, we're so far South we fall off the chart, while the author all of a sudden seems to have lost the abitlity to come up with some half-decent conversations.
Instead of going at it like a seasoned pro, Jack-In-The-Box delivers a modus operandus akin to a failed car mechanic attempting to build a particle accelerator in his garden shack.
Well, Jack had me kinda hypnotized, at least; moreso by the simpletonian structure of the hypno-wizard's thinking processes and stupefying manner in which he goes about things than by the great-googeli-moogeliness of the story.
Hit the road, Jack, and come back with more and better...
JJ (4/10)

Reviewer: Piers (Edit) Rating: Jul 10, 2014
In general, I liked the story. It needed a bit, though. It was good as far as it went, but why not add a description of the Concubine quarters as well? you touched on several things that could have enriched the story. I think you were focusing on the hypnosis technique to the detriment of the rest of the story. It started out well, but seemed hurried by chapter 3 (6/10)

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