trusting vanillas

[GearJammer]

A lot to take in here. On edit, this will appear to ramble a bit, I hope if you start to read it, you hold on to the end. I tried to tie it together then.

Icey, it's been said, Russell said it most succinctly, that you lost connection with people you called friends who were not friends, in fact. STILL, since you saw them as friends, that hurt, I know (believe me I do), and I'm very sorry you had that kind of pain.

We cannot pick our families. We do pick our friends (and acquaintances). When a "friendship" falls apart like that, it hits us on two levels: first, that our little world of acceptance is fractured, and second, that our own judgement is called into question. I am so glad Icehawk has a history of protecting you, as that gives you a place that is YOUR place, from where you can deal with these losses. Well done, Icehawk.

Part of the rest of what needs be said has been said and I echo it. in summary, it is wrong that you have had to deal with these bullshit accusations and conclusions, but in the end you ARE strong, and you HAVE survived and are looking forward to thriving. You have made responsible choices (preserving your children's ties with their grandparents, for instance) that indicate what a good person and submissive you are, as you put their well being above your personal wants.

Tyd, it appears the same is probably true of you.

The rest of what I see when I see things like this is less personal, more general. If people would merely generate the capability to see life for what it is, instead of having to "box" everything into little boxes, then we would all be better off. I find it interesting, for instance, that some of the fundamental bible people (I speak from some serious knowledge) would tell a wife to be submissive to her husband (and yes, those few individuals mean "that" kind of submission as well as more, although they won't admit it) but then condemn a Dominant/submissive sexual life. Fools and idiots that they are, they have failed to consider principle first and apply it, and have first seen practice instead. Ironically, the "worthlessness" that a visible few of them preach as submission is NOT biblical, and more ironically, what married D/s couples practice consentually IS biblical. I won't preach, but if someone wants details, PM.

Why is that a good example? Why bring it in to this conversation? Because fundamental bible belief is usually seen as the total opposite of the lifestyle, yet the practices and principles of the lifestyle exist within it, and are actually encouraged by it, limited to a monogamous relationship. In short, D/s is everywhere, in varying levels and in varying capacities, and trying to reject it is like trying to reject the nitrogen in the air, and accepting the oxygen. The air (and life) is a package deal, take it all and live, or reject it all and die. It is each person's choice. Let's just be honest about our choice and live well and to hell with the narrow minded "box" thinkers that cannot actually stand on their own two feet.