Quote Originally Posted by cadence View Post
I'll second that, and to be honest, the first year of my existence here has taught me to learn many things about myself, and what I needed in regards to what I wanted through trial and error. Most of my experiences have not been good ones to say the least.
I would be the first to offer my input as to what can go wrong in general. Not saying that everything I have gone through was horrible, but my inexperience and confused state made me an easier target for being the used prey that other dominants seek to abuse.
I can completely relate to that cadence and also have found that learning about myself and my wants and views has made me a stronger person and now one a little less likely to be abused

If there is ever any advice I give new subs, it's that - to look at your own self, wants and thoughts first. They find it very hard as a lot of subs do since we don't tend to think in terms of ourselves and isn't it about pleasing Them, not ourselves? lol - So, not only is it almost unthinkable to do but a very hard task as well requiring patience, another thing many subs are not well known for lol

It goes a long way in finding a far better match though but like our children, sometimes you just cannot teach from your own mistakes - they need to do some of the learning (and failing) on their own