As odd as it sounds, I've always found my subs when I wasn't looking for them. Innocent postings on Craigslist (platonic) asking to discuss BDSM, or even just to chat and pass the time, often incredibly led to the realization that we both shared many common interests. It seems if you are specifically looking for a sub you are immediately competing with a hundred other "doms" who all know the most impressive lingo imaginable......