Well said all. I would further say that there needs to be set limits, that can negotiated as you grow and learn, with a set of punishments. Especially since this is new and you would not want one or the other to become resentful or unwilling to participate.

I'm not saying that a vanilla relationship is bad, if you both can not do this, but slowly growing in this together can form a stronger bond and lead you into the relathionship you crave.

Good luck!!!!!