It might be helpful to consider the BDSM world as a restaurant.

Would you expect a restaurant only to serve dishes that are to your liking? Surely not.

If you saw a person eat a dish that was not to your liking, would go walk over and speak loudly with other guests about how horrible that dish was, and that you would never ever want to try it? Surely not, because you would know
- it would be highly rude and extremely bad manners;
- unless you have been expressively invited to share this particular dish, itīs really none of your business.

Try and see the restaurant and look at the menu - there are loads of dishes there, and something for almost everyone.

People are willing to give tolerance as long as they get the same in return...