Greetings From A Perculiar Scumbag

[IAmCanadian]

Hello there all,

I just found this forum.

I'm a degenerate and misogynist who likes nothing better than to see (more likely imagine) a woman reduced to a heartbreaking, cum-dumpster parody of her former upstanding and potential-filled self.

To me, things like rape, choke-fucking, verbal abuse, physical abuse, pregnancy, abortion, incest, bestiality, piss, and shit are just tools, means to an end...a sculptor's chisel with which I can better knock away the marble outcroppings of female dignity, self-worth and humanity.

I like to write stories where this happens.

My usual M.O. is to take a female protagonist from popular media and tell the tale of her journey from upstanding, idealized pinnacle to jizz-drooling, mindless sperm-trap.

I'm stuck in no man's land.

You might now be thinking to yourself "Ewww...you write fanfics? Go and post somewhere else- we don't want to see Harry Potter giving Snape a reach-around while he wears a leather wizard hat."

I don't blame you for that reaction, but those aren't the sort of stories I write. If I did, I wouldn't be here. The problem is, I write stories where beloved female characters get treated like subhuman dirt. So-called serious (ie. "delusions of grandeur") fanfic writers ignore or turn up their noses at the type of lowest-common-denominator garbage that I publish. They're more interested in the characters than the fetish.

So here I am. I don't know if the sort of story I write is appropriate for this archive so I decided to dip my toe into the forums and poke around a little to see what I could find out. Along the way, maybe I'll actually meet some people with whom I have something in common. People to whom the agonized cry of a young woman is an aphrodisiac. People who can understand the fundamental beauty of an empty-eyed slattern performing acts that snuff out the last vestiges of her dignity like a guttering candle flame.

I suppose I'm not a conventional BDSM fan (or maybe it's hubris on my part to label myself as different when in fact I'm just a typical male filled to the brim with macho fantasies of cock-worshipping fuckslaves). I am interested in sadism and masochism on a fundamental level. I crave not to scar the flesh with whips and chains but to scar the very existance. I want to leave my mark on a woman's dignity instead of her face. You can make a case that true masochism is the desire for the destruction of oneself, and that's the sort of scenario I seek to inflict as I draw up fantasies. What is more fundamentally destructive to a woman than to end her existance as a being of status and submit to a life of disgrace?

Hopefully some of you can relate. Anyway, I'll be around.

Yours,

- FS

[orchidsoul]

Hi FS,

Welcome to the forums.

Based upon your first few postings out of the gates, I'm thinking you're open to the idea of comments.

I'll bite.

I'm not sure if I've misunderstood... but are these all fantasies or truly are you searching for that masochist (though I think sadist and masochist are not strong enough terms to describe what you and a theoretical partner seek) to share in these experiences?

Forgive me for being concerned for any party to become a part of this style relationship. Truly I'm anything but a judgemental person, to each their own, but I'm not understanding in any remote way the depth of these types of desires. To me, it's just purely abuse unless I've missed where there's any expressed care for the person willing to entertain your whims. Or is that truly what someone wants?

please help enlighten me. And perhaps there's others that may share your sentiments that can help explain to me how this is a rewarding relationship for both.

I'm sorry- I just don't understand.

cheers,
Orchidsoul

[denuseri]

wellcome to the site

you may find some here that share your intrests, i am also sure you will find plenty of people that are going to be a little judgemental, i am sure you are used to it, it is as far as i can muster the extreme end of aristotles golden mean conserning dignity and humiliation that you are fantasizing about

my only reccomendation is that it remain indeed a fantasy, as the life of another human being would be involved

the forums are full of great information on bdsm, as well as having a very nice personels section and chatroom

feel free to pm any of the staff or myself with conserns or questions, we are more than willing to lend a hand


i shall reserve my own judgements
for actions speak louder than words

your friendly nieghborhood kajira
denuseri

[MasochisticAngel]

I agree with you.
I myself am an extreme masochist.
I love more than nothing when my master degrades me
emotionally and physically.
I hope to see ou around.

[Ozme52]

to the site.

I have no doubt your stories will be appreciated... whether or not you find someone for yourself to boot... well, good luck in your quest. I think there's probably someone who matches up with every kink in the book. This one just might take longer... but then, that will mean you'll have plenty of time to contribute to our little community.

Enjoy.

[IAmCanadian]

Along with some friendly hellos, there are some very sobering responses here which make me think that I've likely misjudged the impact of my words. As a newcomer, I probably should have been a lot more cautious in the beginning. Considering the extremely inflammatory content of my other posts, I can only imagine the sort of responses that might have resulted. I'll try to work up the courage to check after I post. In my defense I can only offer the explanation that I didn't see my remarks as relatively alarming at the time of posting.

In practice this sort of relationship would be all about maintaining a pretense and indulging fantasies attached to that pretense. I imagine that such a relationship would carry with it a pact between my partner and I, in which care and mutual feelings of love and respect would be a largely unspoken part. When abuse is based on inflicting a feeling of worthlessness for sexual titillation on both ends, feelings of love and affection spoil the mood.

Of course, the way I look at it, what I want to do is no more abusive than dripping candle-wax on a pair of exposed buttocks. It's just a brand and extremity of infliction for which I haven't found a willing masochist.

Looking back over what I've said here and elsewhere, though, I'm slightly haunted by the use of the word "theoretical" to describe my would-be sub in the responses. Though it wasn't meant as such, this word comes as a sort of indictment of the entire idea. Perhaps you're right- perhaps it is just unworkable and perverse- a male fantasy born some long time ago that I haven't been able to shed. Whether or not that's the case, I can't deny that it appeals to me, as hyperbolic as some of the suggested acts may seem.

EDIT: Intellectual honesty and sadism again clash here. The major obstacle I encounter is the inconsistancy between degrading a submissive for sexual pleasure and simultaneously appreciating that person for the unique and wonderful companion they represent. It's already been said that the perfect submissive for me would be a rare woman indeed, and I agree! Rare and precious as a caged bird with the brightest of plumage. So how could I want to turn her into a such a worthless, self-deprecating slut, telling her constantly how little she's worth, and encouraging her to say the same? This is where the truth of this relationship is best illustrated. In lowering herself to indulge my fantasies (and hers) she ironically proves her preciousness even as she's screaming at the top of her lungs about how much of a garbage pail she is. It's in the extremity of her desire to have no value that she proves her value. In time of passion, sure- we would play at her personal oblivion. Unspoken between us, though, would be the intellectually honest truth that she is worth more to me than anything.

- FS

[MrDom]

Welcome to the forums

[orchidsoul]

Thank you FS for clarifying. It was the unspoken care and respect I had been missing from your desires that alarmed me.

Don't be haunted by my incorrect use of a word. "Potential" would have been the better choice. It was late and used more in the sense that you hadn't found her yet.

[cadence]

Hello and Welcome to a fellow Canadian, hope you enjoy your time here, I look forward to reading more of your posts

[Maitresse_Emeraude]

mmmm... such an interesting thing are you...

I've seen your post and Let me assure you, You'll be good recieved here...

[VaAugusta]

If you do this IRL just be careful about the pregnancy one you mentioned, since you're effecting someone who's not a willing participant.

[Dunccc]

I've been a reader of this site for a long time and just registered to the forums today out of boredom; having glanced through a thousand worthless internet forums over the years I wasn't expecting anything other than AOL speak and spam. But I've been incredibly impressed at the level of open-mindedness and the quality of posting shown, especially in a thread like this which could easily have been greeted with derision, hostility or abuse.

So, hello everyone!

And to the original poster: I'm not sure that the experiences you seek are really as rare as you think, many of the stories here bear testament to the fact that lots of people share similar fantasies. Also, films made by people/firms such as Max Hardcore, Insex, MFX etc often display similar themes of extreme degradation, and they sell a lot of material to a lot of people, both dominant and submissive. I'm sure you'll eventually find what you're looking for if, as you say, you're seeking these experiences within the context of a loving and mutually rewarding relationship.

[IAmCanadian]

If you do this IRL just be careful about the pregnancy one you mentioned, since you're effecting someone who's not a willing participant.

Just felt the need to reply to this one.

Obviously, in all cases the woman would be a willing participant. I'm an enlightened sadist, not a sociopath. If you mean the baby that might result, I certainly have no intention of forcing pregnancy-related degradation on someone who isn't already pregnant or willing to become so (and subsequently treat that pregnancy like any other). I'm sure nothing bad would befall the baby as a result. This sort of play is 90% mental.

Such things all seem non-consensual because in "normal" society no right-thinking woman would ever consent to such things. In the dark corners of the mind though, and safely cloistered away in under the supervision of a certain person, some women are perfectly willing to consent to, and be mercilessly complicit in, their own degradation.

That's what I'm looking for.

- FS

EDIT: This thought almost made me laugh out loud- I'm not sure what scientists are currently saying about the effects of external noises on babies when they are in-utero, but if tone of voice (speaking harshly instead of soothingly, for example) is something that affects an unborn child, then verbally abusing a pregnant woman might be actually be a discouraged pre-natal practice for doms and their wives. Hell, for all I know, it is! Has anyone written "BDSM For Pregnant People" yet?

[craven]

hello and welcome it as as they say horses for courses, i am sure that many here will appreciate how you write and enjoy it, a few more will secretly love it and of course deny it, LOL, welcome to the library, i hope you find that which you seek

[Akari_Kuragi]

I must say that this was very interesting to read.

Welcome to the forums, though I'm not really one to talk (me being new and all).

Hope you find someone for yourself. : )

[rosebud]

very interesting, indeed...

Hi Welcome to the Forums! Enjoy!

[leah06]

I think I understand what FS is looking for, but I would strongly caution that unless you are able to perform a Vulcan mind-meld, "unspoken" assurances and assumptions can lead a relationship into trouble. At some point you have to check in with each other, or it's a sort of emotional parallel play. You don't really know what's going on in there, and neither does she.

Also, at some point people can actually become what they start out only pretending to be.

[IAmCanadian]

At some point you have to check in with each other, or it's a sort of emotional parallel play. You don't really know what's going on in there, and neither does she.

Also, at some point people can actually become what they start out only pretending to be.

Absolutely true. I would never wish to have this situation occur. I am not interested in "actual" subhuman, brainless slaves. I am interested in beautiful and intelligent women who
see appeal in shrugging off the weight of their dignity and humanity, like Atlas taking a break, and reveling in a state of stupidity, sluttiness, recepticalization, and obscenity...the
deepest and most taboo contrast to the empowered truth.

But there's no more truth to that state than there is truth to the idea that a woman deserves to be bound and hit. (Which we could also do, by the way ^_^). It's all a ritual,
designed to show submission, to build trust, and to build a bond.

- FS