I just can't see the point of being set a task which he knows I fail. It seems to set up us both on a route to something which we both dislike.

TDS - you ask about Dom's deliberately putting a sub into a no-win situation. I don't think I have ever experienced that, and I would feel betrayed if he did. I take his requests extremely seriously and do my utmost to meet them - I would not know how to react to a deliberately impossible one, but thinking about it, it would seem to mock my endeavours to please him and it would be harmful to our relationship.

Now a task which he hopes I will achieve, but will stretch me, is different. That becomes a mutual task, my part is to keep going and be successful in it, and his is to encourage and support me to help me to achieve that success. If I succeed then we can both celebrate, and if I fail, we both fail, and knowing that the disappointment we both feel at what I have not achieved is more than adequate punishment. At that point I need reassurance rather than isolation. Now, that reassurance might involve me getting very sore - not as a punishment, but as a reaffirmation of our relationship.

cariad