So I forgot to make the bed (twice) and now we have an interesting discussion

[kestrel]

I wasn't a reinforcement I wasn't even aware that there was an argument between dominants. I was stating my opinion and I'm sure everyone else was as well. I was engaging in a discussion not getting between anyone.

I was trying to get involved more in the forums as a way of personally remembering and honouring Rabbit who I respected a lot in the time I knew him- now I feel like I should just stay away as everything seems to be misconstrued.

Honey, please don't let the pissing matches between others chase you away. If you go they win and end up taking over everything and that's not what Rabbit would have wanted. Honor him by staying. Please!

[rach]

Honey, please don't let the pissing matches between others chase you away. If you go they win and end up taking over everything and that's not what Rabbit would have wanted. Honor him by staying. Please!

I'm not leaving, just going to go back to lurking and reading. Just seems that everything ends up being a pissing match between someone. Hardly want to get in the middle of that.

[Rhabbi]

I wasn't a reinforcement I wasn't even aware that there was an argument between dominants. I was stating my opinion and I'm sure everyone else was as well. I was engaging in a discussion not getting between anyone.

I was trying to get involved more in the forums as a way of personally remembering and honouring Rabbit who I respected a lot in the time I knew him- now I feel like I should just stay away as everything seems to be misconstrued.

Honey, please don't let the pissing matches between others chase you away. If you go they win and end up taking over everything and that's not what Rabbit would have wanted. Honor him by staying. Please!

Totally agree with kestrel here.

[rach]

Totally agree with kestrel here.

But it happens on nearly every thread!

[Rhabbi]

But it happens on nearly every thread!

Maybe because the issues you care about are the ones that other people care about also. Does not mean that you are being singled out, just that you care.

[rach]

Maybe because the issues you care about are the ones that other people care about also. Does not mean that you are being singled out, just that you care.

Oh LOL! I know it's not me being singled out I didn't mean to give that impression! Just means that I am liable to walk into something if it's on the threads I care about!

[Rhabbi]

Oh LOL! I know it's not me being singled out I didn't mean to give that impression! Just means that I am liable to walk into something if it's on the threads I care about!

Happens to me occasionally also, like in this instance. I just tend to defend my opinions if challenged.

[rach]

Happens to me occasionally also, like in this instance. I just tend to defend my opinions if challenged.

LOL ok thanks guys- hissy fit is now over...wanders off to find somewhere to post wearing fireproof clothing....

[kestrel]

YAY!! Ya look right sexy in them fireproof bloomers girlie! ~LMAO~

[rach]

YAY!! Ya look right sexy in them fireproof bloomers girlie! ~LMAO~

Twirls round! Ya think? LOL

[princess_of_pain]

*Edited*

[John56{vg}]

Okay okay *spraying my mod fire extinguisher around* just move along folks nothing to see here.

.....Uh except if it might be rach in her lovely fire retardant bloomers (hubba hubba).

I'll just be following her to her threads. heheheheheheheheehehe.

I love you all, why can't we all just try to get along, sob sob.

[rach]

.

....Uh except if it might be rach in her lovely fire retardant bloomers (hubba hubba). I'll just be following her to her threads. heheheheheheheheehehe.

giggles and blushes.

[moptop]

Well, I posted a totally innocent and slightly tongue in cheek response to a much earlier post by OS, without reading the rest... and have simply decided that not posting it would be a better idea.

*scatters rose petals*

[rach]

And it was mean and fiendish, OS. *squirms and cringes* God, I hate that! Making me admit my wrongs and quantify them... bastards, all of you.

And isn't that why we love them?

LOL

[Rhabbi]

And it was mean and fiendish, OS. *squirms and cringes* God, I hate that! Making me admit my wrongs and quantify them... bastards, all of you.

And isn't that why we love them?

LOL

Best way to live.

[princess_of_pain]

I'll be moving along too now. I come to the Library to enjoy myself. If I wanted to hang out with a bunch of people who like arguing, I'd stop shunning (most of) my blood relatives.

[moptop]

Lollll - OK, edited too late so my post lives on! Oh well - princess, shame you couldn't settle here - it is perfectly possible to find the fun and forget the fierce. Things bubble up... and subside. rach, please do stay in the forefront as well. Hey - they're only doms. They're not scarey.

Oh, hang on - they are scarey, aren't they? Right, I forgot.

[rach]

Things bubble up... and subside. rach, please do stay in the forefront as well. Hey - they're only doms. They're not scarey.

Oh, hang on - they are scarey, aren't they? Right, I forgot.

LOL I will attempt to stay at the forefront, although I imagine my um I don't know- animals that hide- instincts will probably kick in at some point! And yes they are scarey but ya know would we have them any other way?

[moptop]

LOL I will attempt to stay at the forefront, although I imagine my um I don't know- animals that hide- instincts will probably kick in at some point!

Meerkat! Be a meerkat! They are cute and make you go 'Awwww' and they hide in holes. Alternatively you could be a sea-cucumber, but they lack the cuddly...

And yes they are scarey but ya know would we have them any other way?

We have them whatever way they want, I believe

[rach]

Meerkat! Be a meerkat! They are cute and make you go 'Awwww' and they hide in holes. Alternatively you could be a sea-cucumber, but they lack the cuddly...

Oh I love meerkats they're so adorable....nods! Sea cucumber? eww!
LOL

[Ocean_Soul]

Lollll - OK, edited too late so my post lives on! Oh well - princess, shame you couldn't settle here - it is perfectly possible to find the fun and forget the fierce. Things bubble up... and subside. rach, please do stay in the forefront as well. Hey - they're only doms. They're not scarey.

Oh, hang on - they are scarey, aren't they? Right, I forgot.

BOO!

[kestrel]

Okay okay *spraying my mod fire extinguisher around* just move along folks nothing to see here.

.....Uh except if it might be rach in her lovely fire retardant bloomers (hubba hubba).

I'll just be following her to her threads. heheheheheheheheehehe.

I love you all, why can't we all just try to get along, sob sob.

~hugs ya and kisses your cheek then hands ya a white lace hankie~

Only because it's you!!

[John56{vg}]

Awwww kestrel, thank you.

Wraps the hankie around the wrist next to my fire retardant Mod gloves. I take your hand and resepectfully kiss your hand and tip my hat to you.

My pleasure milady. You honor me, teeheee.

[annie]

OK...

First off... John, thanks for putting out the initial fire! Well done! Glad you were able to save Rachel's and her fire retardant bloomers!

Secondly...

Many of the posts have been edited, which included removing, some that were inappropriate. And, while some were not listed as "directly" inflammatory, based on the way the thread was going they were removed as well due to the potentially underlying assumptions that were both implied and received.

Thirdly...Rhabbi, Oz and p.o.p.... please check your pm's.

Fourthly... Oz... NO, insults to you are not tolerated just as they aren't to anyone on the board. My apologies that they were not caught earlier.

So... let's all play together nicely! It is a great topic... no need to make it personal!

[thrall]

Hello everyone......

I have a question for OZ........

HI Oz.......

In the cum restriction thread you make reference to a "middle road", could you explain this please?

I think that is where all the fuss is coming from......

thanks thrall

ok...........lets try this again....................lol


I asked this before it got all off track............

[Hime]

I'm not sure why anyone needs to have an opinion on what other people do in their private relationships. Obviously, they're having fun. Is it bad, wrong fun? Well, yes, but that's what we're here for, isn't it?

[Logic1]

My initial reaction was to stay out and boy was I right.

so for me to answer this original question about the unmade bed then..
your life and your walls so your decision but heres my take.

I got a huge king size bed. It is normally unmade cause I like it that way. I make it when I have people over or when my ex sub lived here we actually made it together cause it was faster in the morning and we are both not morningpeople lol.
If I had told my pet that her task was to make the bed every morning and then she forgot it once in a blue moon then fine. No big deal cause I forget things too at times.
If she forgot it more often (all up to a feeling here) then the punishment question arise. Should she have a punishment and if so what?
The ex just got horny as hell from a hands on spanking so it had to be a belt cause that wasnt pleasure as a hands on spanking was for her.
how many? I tend to ask my subs cause they would know *weg*

is it repeating itself or is it just the fact that mornings can be really stressful and things actually gets forgotten?
is it something that I would forget or dont have time for? if so i would be more lenient.

forgetting to make the bed twice in (dont know the timespan here) but say a month or 2 and that was her task then yes she would be punished.
It wouldnt however be something severe cause that is a thing that I could forget just as easily and punishing something like that harshly just to me seems odd.
A made bed isnt a "hard limit" lol for me

Telling my sub that she is gonna be dressed and ready at 7 and when she isnt then yes I would be annoyed and I would punish her, cause that always happens. I know the reasons for it and all that but still. If I say 7 then you better be ready at 7.
that is a "hard limit" for me which revokes a real punishment.

I might add something else later on but for now it seems okay lol

[Mishka]

Holy crap. Go away a few days and look at the mess! Damn Doms...no wonder they have subs...somebody has to clean up.

Which brings up the topic of this thread. (like the segue?)

"Forgetfullness"...is it a legitimate excuse/reason?

Context is everything. i.e. housekeeping. While I will endeavor to improve I will never (and I do mean, strongly, never) be a perfect housekeeper. Not even an especially good one. If Master says to me "Mishka, you will have the bed made, the dishes done and dinner cooked by the time I get home", I could do that. If He wants it every single day...now we're getting into personality clashes.

"I forgot". You can say that flippantly. You can put it out there for everything you didn't do, without remorse, without consideration. I get Oz's point on this kind of forgetfullness. It's childish. It's not even an attempt at obedience, it's simply not bothering.

Then there's *slaps head* "I completely forgot about that." The "I remembered it, just not when I was home to do it." Mine is the "I was so distracted I forgot." As Annie mentioned, "Senior/ADD moment."

Excusing myself before even confessing or even apologizing is inconsiderate vanilla or D/s. Is it really "I was too lazy.", "I didn't give what You said a second thought.", "I didn't think it was that important.", etc etc.?

Golly, pick the battles. Know the person you're with. If it's play then play. If it's training then get to it. If it's willful disobedience then get to the core issue of it. I may not be the most experienced person on this list, but I understand differences in personalities. Anyone ever get the premarital counseling about "He squeezes the tooth paste in the middle, you squeeze it from the bottom. It's going to annoy the hell out of you." speech? The lesson is what's worth getting upset over? What's worth changing?

My Master chooses what training I need in certain areas. I don't remember the last time he "played" discipline. If it were something we could joke about while I learned, like making the bed, it might take longer, but maybe some things are like that? Not all, but a few? Is it ok? Well...I'm not seeing the reason to get upset about this.

I like the way Rhabbi Dominates me. When He is firm I learn and that is a very safe place to be, and my submission (I believe) improves because of it.

That's my limited experience. Perhaps someone with a live-in 24/7 M/s relationship could explain their experience from both sides it might help. Honestly, it seems to be a personality thing rather than a cut and dry D/s rule.

[Guest 91108]

silly subbies... laughs.