Surprising your Dominant

[Isabelle90]

Without prior discussion have you ever surprised your Dom/me with something you thought they might like but weren't too sure? For example, a journal about your day, fetish clothing (even though you weren't entirely sure about the reaction), toys...

Is initiating things too much like topping for you? Has your Master/Mistress ever been displeased or unenthused by your gesture? Did it completely fall flat? Was there some sense of humor about it? Annoyance? Consequences?

Or do you always make sure to ask first?

but.. i would like the surprise if the Sub knew what i liked in the first place. something out of character wouldn't work. but then if i did the same it wouldn't either. is a trade of sorts.

I've thought about different actions I could take to steer things in the direction I desired. I've asked other more experienced doms and subs and have been told that that was topping from the bottom. It was all so confusing.

I read this thread when I first joined, not so long ago, and again this morning. Suddenly, it makes sense! Both partners should take responsibility in learning about one another, whether or not it's a hit or miss. "It's the thought that counts."

A D/s relationship is not one sided. (Finally, sleep deprivation has paid off!)

May I say, kitten, that I love your surprises. In fact I am actually thinking about sharing the surprise you gave me yesterday with everyone so they can all appreciate what a wonderful sub I have.

It should be no surprise to you that you've made me blush. Again.

Is it too late to hear the rest of this story?

[gloombunny]

I've asked other more experienced doms and subs and have been told that that was topping from the bottom. It was all so confusing.

Nine times out of ten when someone says "topping from the bottom", they really mean "you're not doing BDSM the way I do it, so you're wrong". Ignore them.