It is really important to speak up and ask the questions. Don't think that the asking is going to cause problems--the issue is already there and ignoring it will not make it go away.

I believe that the only wrong questions are those that are not asked. Be advised, though, that you won't always get the answers that you are hoping for. Listen respectfully and try to understand where they are coming from.

If they say that nothing is wrong, ask another question. Usually, if someone is not thinking, they are feeling. So at any given time one may not be thinking and so “Nothing” may be an acceptable response.

When “Nothing” is the answer, follow up with “What are you feeling?” If you are always answered with "Nothing," that a sure sign that something is wrong. To me, it means that they are afraid to tell you what they think.

Create an environment from the first stage that values openness and honesty. Want to make your relationships better? Communicate with your partner. Want to find a way to make your relationship last longer? Communicate with your partner. Want to have some really great sex? Communicate with your partner.