I agree. The sense I get is that this Dom is new to all this and so may not yet have found the confidence he needs to be the Dom you think he should be. He may also be staying away out of a desire to not make the situation worse than it already is (even if that is apparently causing a problem) by avoiding the possibly inevitable and explosive confrontation that will result if he spends too long with the parents. Its possibly a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation. A confrontation may air all the problems and clear the air a little but it is also likely to lead to a lot more trouble for the OP in the long run and may even precipitate a situation where she is forced to leave home.

As an aside, I feel this thread has highlighted a major difference between the UK and the USA. By 19 I had already moved out of my parent's house and considered that they had no say on what I did or who with. They had the right to comment and I would listen to their advice but not the right to outright forbid. But, by 18 in this country you are considered to be legally responsible for your own actions. Is this not the case in USA or is it the later age of 21?