Yes i believe it. If you defend them ....it may not really be their fault..but yours...right? Were you a bit annoyed that i had the audacity to say something bad about them??...And you wanted to tell me how good they are???......Are you defending the mental image of what you want them to be....or truly what they are?
One of the biggest tricks abusers and molesters have is that they are very good seducers and manipulates.....its how they control.....
They will seduce you into thinking and feeling whatever suits their own ends.....From what you say...it appears to me that they "need" you now....of course they want you to think that they have "made it all up to you".....they will try and convince you that you have indeed "forgiven" them....
I would lay down good money..... that they also know that you would do anything for their love and approval.....
Its emotional blackmail.......its how they keep you silent.
I don't think it is so much as we took the fight away from you Rowen...more like you are letting the fight go...
Here is something else i want you to think about....
You are hiding in the light when the only thing anyone sees is the smile that hides the pain. When you are asked...."are you alright..is everything OK"....and the inevitable answer is..........a resounding......"Yes I'm just fine,thank you".....along with a great big smile.....
You whisper your pain into the darkness.....you scream it.....that way no one can see.....
Your truth is here Rowen...for anyone who can see.....This is where you can say the "it".......and not be judged for anything......saying the "it" to a therapist is vastly different than saying "it" in public......Cathartic isn't it?
I have not gone though this thread.....but i believe it is to stop the flow of blood.......it is to support all those who need it in terms of past abuse.......and it would appear that you did need just that.......support.....and at this moment......in public. That is why you asked me here to look at your post......
Big hugs
t