I didn't come to realize my need to be in control while in a relationship until I was 32. Before that I was just content to live a relaxed life, and let happen what happened. It was during a verbally abusive time with my ex-wife that I figured out that being controlled, being told what to do was exactly the opposite of what would make me happy.

Now have I been dominating my whole life? No, I am more quiet, laid back, and mellow that those who find a need to be in control all the time. I am perfectly content to let someone else lead a group, but if the group isn't going in the direction I wish to go, rather than try and change the direction, I just leave the group and do my own thing.

I have however been somewhat sadistic my whole life. I didn't make the sexual connection to it until after I started my search for a Dominant submissive relationship. What I did in my youth, that I didn't realize was a form of sadism at the time, was to torture my younger sister, my younger brother, as well as the pet cat. I remember one specific time where I tried to stick a rocket shaped hot wheel up the cats ass. No I didn't get it to go in, the cat had other ideas about that ordeal.

As to why us Male Dom's are so hard to get info out of... I couldn't say for the others, but I guess for me, it just depends on the questions asked, and if I really know the answers.