BDSM And Feminism: Intertwined? How So?

[damyanti]

See I keep reading here about this bad, emasculating feminist stereotype, and you accuse me of sophistry. I have never met any "militant" feminist or someone spewing stupid biased rehtoric such as emasculation who is taken seriously.

To judge those who say they are feminist, by a narrow "militant" group is like judging all muslims based on terrorists, because they are the true muslims. Both claims are nonsense.

The problem with English language, what is lost in the translation is....having equal rights - to live, make your own choices and be respected as a human being - doesnt mean the sexes are the same.

I have never met "militant" feminist or seen them sitting clostered in groups snickering at me for studying, but I have been subjected on a regular basis to "miss" types mocking me for studying and even giving me unsolicited advice how to get myself a husband or how to get my boyfriend to propose.

In my country women never had to go through the struggle for vote like they did in the US, they had a right to work and equality before the law.

But practice is however different, because those are the "intellectual" rights aplied outside of home, and what happens at home....this is a pretty safe country...but gender based violance is the single biggest problem.

I dont believe in emasculating men, for heaven sake I am attracted to dominants...but I do believe that girls have the same right to education, I dont think men are smarter or better than girls, I refuse to be put to my place because only I know what my place is.

And frankly I am so sick and tired of this threads where its discussed whats real - you are not real submissive unless you give yourself as a slave, no trust questions asked, to a first guy that comes along, or you are not a real woman if you say that you are a feminist. Blah, blah, blah...If everyone just felt good about their choice and stopped needing the validation that it is a right one by making everyone else to subscribe to it, this would be a lot nicer world.

Here, those groups labeled or who call themselves feminist, are those who concern themselves with fighting domenstic violance (unless of course you think thats ok, and falls under gender determened role), fighting for rights of working mothers, for longer stay at home time, for higher child benefits and to protect women against mobbing in the work place. I am not going to appologise for my need to defend them.

Its one thing to choose to be a kajira, to feel that you are one and that that feels right to you, but cant you understand not all women feel that way?

Some women want to be cops, some dont like to wear make up...how is that diminishing men? If a guy finds my ability to form a coherent sentence emasculating...he is not someone I want to be with anyway. Do you know why? Because guys like that are those who slap you around. and not in a nice way. And it is thanks to feminists that I have a right not to be forced into marriage with one such jerk.

Lady who said that she had lived history, and is feeling nostalgic about good old times...well (when it comes to patriarchy) I still live with one foot in it and plenty of women in it with both. Yes it means men will open the door for you, it also means you are only seen as an easily replaceable birthing machine, it means he gets to smack you around and nobody thinks its wrong, it means you are just a piece of meat and if he treats you with kindness and respect its his good will.

It is not PC for working women/mothers to mock those who stay at home and I cant remember ever seeing one doing it, but it is completely ok for stay at home mums to trash those who dont. Why is that ok?

You are sick of feminist "militants", I can relate to that...I am sick of constantly having showed down my throat that unless I claim only my way is right, unless I have a man, unless I give birth, unless I stay at home, unless I wear a skirt...that only women who do that are real women, women of substance and I am a liberal/liberatarian/socialist/intellectual/sophist (or any other term which is today supposed to be derogatory) who has no values.

And such stance and insistance on who is a true lady has caused a madness on opposite end where refusing to dress like a man and having a standing appointment at the hair spa means one is not feminist. So I get to fight two sides of nutty extremists. Thanks.