Quote Originally Posted by thir View Post
Recently the question was put here whether being a switch makes for a better dom/sub.

I would think so in many cases, because you know a lot about what things feel like on the other side of the fence. But try to pose that question on your average bdsm list, and you are likely to get less than respectful answers..

I myself have pondered these comments:

If you both submit and dominate, then you cannot be really serious/devoted in either.

Or that a Dom or sub is born that way, and that is just the way it is.

Or that doms/subs never ever switch.

Or they get in the way of each other in a practical way.

I would be very interested in hearing what others have to say here, as I myself have some problems with getting things straightened out in my head.
My answer to this question is that in my experience dominance and submission- especially slavery do get in the way of each other in a practical way. If you are interested in exactly why I feel that way, please see my post here in the switch forum, in the thread "Permission to Switch". It seems silly to repeat the whole story that I just typed out 10 mins ago. Bottom line is that I am *naturally* a switch- meaning that it is natural for me to wish to submit to a man and dominate women. However, in my case (and I suspect in other people's situations too) switching is as bad for me as a drug or alcohol addiction would be. In my view (regarding myself) switching is a very bad addiction or habit, which I can control with the right support system. For me, switching must be avoided at all cost. I don't look down on switches but I do think that it is a very bad idea- with the exception of bedroom only s&m players who just enjoy switching with each other in play and have no desire for 24/7, TPE etc. I guess I view many switches as misguided and perhaps as wrestling with emotional issues that could be better solved by total abstinance from switching.