We are sort of wired for this at birth but there is also a lot that goes on in life to guide us down certain pathways. Its the nature/nurture debate - every personality trait we have is partially built in to the genes (controlled by what hormones are released when and in what quantities as well as brain architecture and function) and partially due to 'stuff that happens to us as we grow up. The debate used to be which of these was true - genes or environment - but this naive and simplistic model has been replaced by a more subtle model where the argument is the extent to which each trait is determined by each stimulus.

What it largely means from a real world PoV is that it is possible to change your traits through influencing your own environment and taking control (or letting someone else you trust take control of you). So, some who have had events in thier childhood that include abuse can go one of two ways - they either become more dominant as they try to take control of their own life, sometimes in later life striking back at their abusers in some way in order to achieve closure, or they can become more submissive. The latter often 'take control' by finding someone they trust to control their lives and therefore find formal submission. Of course, there are also those who bock out the abuse and therefore may not be affected by it so much unless they are somehow reminded of it and others who may respond in a totally different way.