Quote Originally Posted by fetishdj View Post
I think this highlights a difference...

You have an argument, he roars off in a sulk (or you do the same). This is not 'using the silent treatment as punishment' in a BDSM context. For one thing it is not planned nor preset but an emotional response caused by an argument. Usually people do this because they want to avoid making an argument worse by saying or doing something they may regret - by leaving the situation they gain the chance to regain their control and act more rationally in later engagements.

Silence in BDSM is different. It is planned. The sub knows it will happen and why it is happening. It is not an emotional response to gain time to consider future actions but a demonstration of control and power. You could argue that, by pre-ordaining actions and consequences in this way, a BDSM relationship may well avoid arguments and feelings of abandonment because the sub knows where they stand - they have certainty.
no i got that fetish, i did.

i was actually i guess feeling my way through the question which is typical for me. now i will go immediately go sit in my corner quietly