i was molested when i was 7-8 years old but my situation was a little different then all of yours. i was molested by my 13yr. old female babysitter. To make a long story short she had me believing that spirits from the Ouji board we were playing with had possesed her and wanted to have sex with me. She had me believing that they could possess her at her will and i could have them possess me too. Not knowing any better i thought i wasn't doing it right so i pretended to be possesed to so she could get what she wanted from me. Later she had convinced me that the spirits had raped me and got my spirit pregnant even though i wasn't old enough to be, my spirit was. She perfomed what she called an abortion on me so my parents wouldn't find out. When she was done with the "proceedure" she said she had to seal up the hole she had taken the "seed" from. She used wax from a regular candle (those of you who use wax know that play candles melt at a lot lower temp than regular candles). Needless to say that was the hardest thing for me to try when i started this life style. The worst part was she convinced me that it had happened to my best friend too and i had to help her perform this on my friend too. My husband knew all about this before we started this lifestyle. He wanted me to stop feeling guilty about it and not to fear it. The wax was a process that started on my back then later on my chest. When he told me he wanted to try it on my clit i was afraid of how i would react. He knew i needed to do it as a last step of putting this in my past so he said i had no choice but he didn't do it in a threatening way. He knew i needed it. When the time came i was nervous but as soon as the wax hit it was like all the memories flashed bfore my eyes then were gone. They don't bother me or hold me captive any more. i think i may have always been submissive but what happened to me made me fear it instead of embrace it. Now i know i don't have to be submissive in life and i can enjoy being submissive when i want. i must admit that i have never had experience with a female sub and kind of shy away from it probably because of this situation but that is another obstical i'm willing to overcome if the situation ever comes up. I still can't look at a Ouji board without the memories coming out but at least i'm not afraid of them anymore.