In today's society, men are generally brought up to be very respectful of women. A five-year-old boy knows that he shouldn't hit girls. You're not going to turn a vanilla guy into a sadist overnight, so that's important to keep in mind. Also, since you know more about what you want in this regard, you're kind of going to have to explain and show him how to be dominant- unless you want to get involved in your local scene, but that seems like it might freak him out even more. I agree with Denuseri; I think he should get an account here and chill with us.

It's also possible that he won't be interested in BDSM in any way, shape or form. Just as some people are naturally drawn to it, it simply doesn't click for others. Bottom line, though- you're going to have to be really honest with him about what you're looking for. It helps to be really vocal about it when he pushes one of your buttons. Positive reactions often ease the transition. Good luck! I hope this helps some!