Quote Originally Posted by Isabelle90 View Post
Many have said that a D/s relationship is one of honesty and respect. If someone is in a D/s relationship outside of a marriage, presumably vanilla, how can either of them (D/s couple) know that the other is being honest?

When is it "okay" to have a relationship outside of marriage? If someone realizes they are dominant or submissive but their spouse is neither, is it appropriate to start a new relationship with someone that is in the lifestyle?
I took quite awhile and read all of the posts in this thread.. Besides feeling the strain in my eyes.. I'm feeling envious- ( of Oz and Captain and sipgirl..) and I'm feeling empathy for those who are submissive in a vanilla marriage that just isn't working......

Everyone here has had so much to say.... and everyone is entitled to their opinion... so here's mine.

For the first question... only you can decide what you believe.
The second question- No one can tell you when it's "okay" to do anything. YOU are the one who has to decide that.

Life would be soooo much easier if we could get concrete, black and white answers to questions like that wouldn't it?

As for all of the references to "cheating" and the breaking of marriage vows.. Why is it that everyone always reacts so strongly to that- when reality is the first vows usually broken are "love and cherish". If those vows weren't broken, maybe the remain faithful vow wouldn't be either.....

prepared for rotten vegetables and stones....