Male submissives

[yama]

So maybe some male subs are more into having fantasies fulfilled than actually submitting to another.

It is a very interesting thread, I have learned a lot from the posts, having read each of them. There is an expression: "In my humble opinion." Well, my dears, my opinion wants to be truly humble. I am new, young and unexperienced. Please don't hesitate to correct me, I want to be really docile.

I am neither a male sub nor a Domme. But my submission became reality when I found somebody that was ready to fulfil my secret fantasies. I found another girl whom I was able to have long, intimate talks with, and, first time in my life, I was able to reveal my masochistic fantasies. To my surprise, she expressed, very shyly, her readiness to humiliate and torture me. This talk ended up with my getting topless and her whipping my breasts and back with the strap of her bag. Since that it has been continuing on this line. She doesn't tell me what dresses to wear, but she takes the whip and tells me to strip naked and grab my ankles, and I obey. I can express it so that we are not in D/S relationship, only in S/M, sadist/masochist relationship. She fulfils my fantasies, and I fulfil her fantasies. It was surprising when she first told me to open my mouth and then she spat into my mouth, but I swallowed her spit without hesitation and thanked her. I have a strong experience of being humiliated, without being regulated in my every step.

I ask, humbly: is it wrong if somebody wants his/her fantasies fulfilled?

Please, please, understand me, I ask really humbly, it is not irony at all. I am ready to be corrected. Thank you for your kind attention.

[thir]

I ask, humbly: is it wrong if somebody wants his/her fantasies fulfilled?

No, absolutely not. IMO there is not way that is better than another, even if you'll meet people who'll say that their particular way is the way not just for them, but for eveyone. Just ignore them ;-) The point is that the people in question are happy.

And that is where the problem may be. If, for instance, one of the partners is not honest about what he/she wants - say the have the fantasy of wanting to be a slave, but do not what to do this in reality. This is ok and what many want, but should be said openly, as many people waste time and energy and eventually their hopes of finding a good matching partner because they have to go through so many people who do not admit what they are really after.

The other problem that can arise is that in some cases the sub just want his/her needs met, without having anything to offer.
I am sorry to say this, but I have also encountered subs, male subs mostly, who saw me as some sort of tool to satisfy them, not as a partner in a relationship who also happens to want something out of the whole thing.

That said, this is of course not to mean all male subs, I have met some truly wonderful subs as well :-)

[yama]

Thank you thir - or am I supposed to say Ma'am? I am ready
to bow down before you, really.

Thank you very much for your enlightening post. I start seeing
what is it about. Obviously I had no problem with Lila because we
were already close friends when the SM relationship started. But,
as I have pointed out, there were cases when she lead me in
a surprising direction, and I always followed her lead, even
enjoying my submission. (She accepts ideas from me, though.)

Without previous acquaintance, if I offered myself as a slave,
I would have a strong decision that I would seek what pleases
my Mistress/Master, giving up my own ideas. (I am here with the
same intention, ready to give up my ideas, be as docile as I can.)
Without this, I can well imagine that the Mistress/Master sends
away her/his incorrect sub. I can see what is the problem.

Thank you very much and very humbly again, your were
really very kind in answering me.

No, absolutely not. IMO there is not way that is better than another, even if you'll meet people who'll say that their particular way is the way not just for them, but for eveyone. Just ignore them ;-) The point is that the people in question are happy.

And that is where the problem may be. If, for instance, one of the partners is not honest about what he/she wants - say the have the fantasy of wanting to be a slave, but do not what to do this in reality. This is ok and what many want, but should be said openly, as many people waste time and energy and eventually their hopes of finding a good matching partner because they have to go through so many people who do not admit what they are really after.

The other problem that can arise is that in some cases the sub just want his/her needs met, without having anything to offer.
I am sorry to say this, but I have also encountered subs, male subs mostly, who saw me as some sort of tool to satisfy them, not as a partner in a relationship who also happens to want something out of the whole thing.

That said, this is of course not to mean all male subs, I have met some truly wonderful subs as well :-)

[Ozme52]

It is a very interesting thread, I have learned a lot from the posts, having read each of them. There is an expression: "In my humble opinion." Well, my dears, my opinion wants to be truly humble. I am new, young and unexperienced. Please don't hesitate to correct me, I want to be really docile.

I am neither a male sub nor a Domme. But my submission became reality when I found somebody that was ready to fulfil my secret fantasies. I found another girl whom I was able to have long, intimate talks with, and, first time in my life, I was able to reveal my masochistic fantasies. To my surprise, she expressed, very shyly, her readiness to humiliate and torture me. This talk ended up with my getting topless and her whipping my breasts and back with the strap of her bag. Since that it has been continuing on this line. She doesn't tell me what dresses to wear, but she takes the whip and tells me to strip naked and grab my ankles, and I obey. I can express it so that we are not in D/S relationship, only in S/M, sadist/masochist relationship. She fulfils my fantasies, and I fulfil her fantasies. It was surprising when she first told me to open my mouth and then she spat into my mouth, but I swallowed her spit without hesitation and thanked her. I have a strong experience of being humiliated, without being regulated in my every step.

I ask, humbly: is it wrong if somebody wants his/her fantasies fulfilled?

Please, please, understand me, I ask really humbly, it is not irony at all. I am ready to be corrected. Thank you for your kind attention.

No, of course not. That's what we all desire. But it is, imo, appropriate that the dominant directs how and when the submissive's desires get realized.

Our roles are different, and complementary.

[yama]

But it is, imo, appropriate that the dominant directs how and when the submissive's desires get realized.

Our roles are different, and complementary.

I understand you, Sir, and I fully agree. A submissive must submit.
Even a sadist/masochist or fetish top/bottom relationship means a
sort of domination/submission, only not necessarily in all area of life.
I hope I could make clear that I really submit to my dominant girl,
even if she has surprises for me. And I would obey her if she wanted
to dominate me on other areas. My craving for being humiliated could
make me a real slave. But neither of us is interested in that.

Thank you for your reply. I found it late, because as a silly girl I started
to read the thread at its end. Sorry, Sir. When putting clamps on me,
please remember my misdeed and make them tight.

(Referring to a former conversation on the "Clamps on the clit?" thread.)

[ravnseye]

I've only been a member here for less than a week. I have been masochist since before I knew what one was. For me, it took a great many years to get past the mask that society laid out for me. A few years ago, I accepted, and really started exploring who and what I was/am. Still, I do find it hard to be that in front of others, even in cyber space. In the really real world, I am about as redneck as it gets, more by the people in my life, and where I am and such. Since the first time I pinched my own nip while...er..."relaxing" I have known it wasn't something to talk about, because of what I was taught. Now, I try to get to know people, and read the situation, before I speak. So, for me anyway (I can speak for no other) it isn't a matter of hiding, it's a matter of assessing the place before I speak. I am a sub, and love being so. Give me time to know you, and soon you'll be telling me to shut up, instead of openup

[Slavejamesuk]

i have spent many years reading stories from the library, and only very recently registered for chat. I think many men are more interested in pictures, stories and cyber than in chatting to discuss s&m.

I have been submissive all my life, for many years only to women, and most of whom I had to pay for thier attention.

I have been fortuante to have had a couple of girlfriends dominate me, but both only did it for my pleasure and neither were dommes, but i did live for 8 years with a pro dominatrix and she really enjoyed her work.

I am now bisexual in s&m and this has really opened me to new areas of submission.

With regard to chat and cyber I was very good at impersonating a female sub and had lots of fun and many hours with an erection teasing myself for as long as possible, one handed typing gets better with practice.

Hope everyone enjoys their submission and domination.
Deepest respects
James

[wannabeslave]

i am a male sub who does not have an agenda. i have posted here a couple of times and some other forums, but gotten very little response.

[thir]

i am a male sub who does not have an agenda. i have posted here a couple of times and some other forums, but gotten very little response.

What do you want a response to? Have you got a question or a topic you would like to discuss?

[thir]

With regard to chat and cyber I was very good at impersonating a female sub and had lots of fun and many hours with an erection teasing myself for as long as possible, one handed typing gets better with practice.

Hope everyone enjoys their submission and domination.
Deepest respects
James

Did you do this impersonating because you cannot get answers as a male sub?

[Slavejamesuk]

I impersonated because I had deep fantasy of being a female submissive
i could see myself as a female slave. But it is also true to say I found it easier to get cyber as fem sub. But when I was impersonating Suki
I did not act out my bi male fantasy
hope that explains
best wishes James

[thamlin]

i am a male sub and i am gay and trying to find a a Male Dom is proving hard anybody have any tips