Quote Originally Posted by Rhabbi View Post
Excellent way to state the case.

I myself might want to explore a subs hard limits to see where they actually lie, like annie's example of no tickling. What might be ticklish in one place is not ticklish in another, so I would need to know what she thought was ticklish and where. this does not mean I want to tickle her, just that I want to know how to avoid it.

As for Mishka and her desire to push her limits to please me, this does not mean I am free to run roughshod over those limits. I have to be careful and judge her responses as we explore.
Well, yeah. I hope that I was clear in saying that it's not ok in my book to push for something that's a stated hard limit -- just that the person who has that limit might eventually change their mind.

The other thing that hasn't really been brought up is that Dom/mes have limits, too, and sometimes they can be the subject of the same tension. I think that we subs have to be understanding about those, too. Basically, always remember that the person you're playing with is a person no matter what kind of role they're playing.