I think that everyone here miss read my statement. Words have a way of doing that you say one thing others hear some different.

If a sub tells me she was anally raped with a knife at her throat, forced to bite down on an apple to stop her from screaming then I would quickly know that her hard limit on being taken anally, use of knives in played or gaged is a hard limit, then I would never push on any of them. Hell I love apples but if I accepted her then apples would never be in the house. The opposite of this would be anal is a hard limit because it is wrong. That one I have to push a little to see how real it is. I can't imagine accepting a sub's gift who has ruled out anal but if we are still in the testing each other out stage then during play I would be sure to run a finger lightly over her anus once she was very excited to see the physical and emotional response if she protested or jerked away then that would be my answer. I would then know that anal play with her would be wrong and that would factor into my decision to accept her gift or not. Now if there is no negative response then I would continue to explore of lightly push that limit. A vibrator wet from her own juices would slide over and around her anus while I watched closely for signs. This pushing would continue till I got an adverse response from her. This example is one from my past. She was taught that sodomy was wrong a sin and 3 months later she asked me to take her ass and after that it was a normal event.

When I say push a limit this is what I mean. I never force it no matter how much I want it but without these light pushings I have found that many subs would never grow and find their strength. Any asshole could have had her restrained and gaged and taken her ass but that would be criminal in my eyes.

Also conversation doesn't always allow you to find out much in the first case it would get me all I needed to know to respect those hard limits completely in the second case it got me her religous dogma and not the truth.

If you still think I am a bad Dom for this then it is a free world, but I think you are looking for a Top one who will PLAY by your rules not a Dom that wants to see you grow and experience all that life can offer.