Could you go back?

[lily27]

Are you sure it is all gone forever? Sometimes interest in BDSM ebbs and flows, just as interest in sex ebbs and flows within the confines of a long term relationship. Doesn't mean it is gone forever.... just that life gets in the way for a while. And sometimes it takes a little bit of extra effort to get things kick started again.

If Master woke up one day and announced he was going to be vanilla from now on, I have to say I would be a little bit shocked to begin with. But we started our relationship from an M/s perspective... it is quite defining as to who we are as a couple. And I think we have enough knowledge/experience to know that where we are, is where we want to be.

You said you had a relationship before adding BDSM. Can I ask who sparked the interest there? Maybe his level of interest has never been as high as yours. You say that you are still having kinky sex.... so perhaps that is the level of kink he is comfortable with.

Relationships.... all relationships.... involve compromise. Be honest with him and tell him what your needs are. Encourage him to share his, and really listen. Find a happy medium that keeps you both happy and satisfied.

[casie1124]

Are you sure it is all gone forever? Sometimes interest in BDSM ebbs and flows, just as interest in sex ebbs and flows within the confines of a long term relationship. Doesn't mean it is gone forever.... just that life gets in the way for a while. And sometimes it takes a little bit of extra effort to get things kick started again.

If Master woke up one day and announced he was going to be vanilla from now on, I have to say I would be a little bit shocked to begin with. But we started our relationship from an M/s perspective... it is quite defining as to who we are as a couple. And I think we have enough knowledge/experience to know that where we are, is where we want to be.

You said you had a relationship before adding BDSM. Can I ask who sparked the interest there? Maybe his level of interest has never been as high as yours. You say that you are still having kinky sex.... so perhaps that is the level of kink he is comfortable with.

Relationships.... all relationships.... involve compromise. Be honest with him and tell him what your needs are. Encourage him to share his, and really listen. Find a happy medium that keeps you both happy and satisfied.

I can't remember who sparked the interest really I think it was kind of mutual, as our relationship became more serious we just kind of fell into those roles then discovered there was a name for it, and many more things we could do and experience. Once we discovered the D/s in this since he pretty much took the reins.

Yeah I've tried to explain the whole compromise thing with him. He doesn't want to hear it and doesn't want to hear anything about it period. He is so damn stubern. Which in turn makes me frustrated and causes many arguments.

Blah, I'm at a loss really.