Adding Others to a pre-exisiting Relationship

[sidhewolf]

To Ozme~ I also meant to mention Sir that I am very happy and excited for You and Jeanne and all the progress Ya'll have made. Congradulations! Huggs and Much Respect~SidheWolf

[jeanne]

To Ozme~ I also meant to mention Sir that I am very happy and excited for You and Jeanne and all the progress Ya'll have made. Congradulations! Huggs and Much Respect~SidheWolf

We are happy. Yay!!

[sidhewolf]

We are happy. Yay!!

Also Jeanne, on this> "I haven't yet found my comfort zone in the amount of information I need/want from the two of them about their relationship, so I am feeling my way in it".

I meant to say that *for me* (and dunno if it'll help you in this for yourself?), what I Need to Know about my Partner(s) interactions/Relationship(s) with other(s), is what impacts me and my Relationship with that Partner. And/Or anything that may require a Re-Negotiation of my Relationship Agreements with that Partner. I do expect that the pre-existing Relationship Agreements and pre-established Bounderies will be upheld, or re-negotiated.

Things do Change and people do Grow. And sometimes not in ways we expect or want. But it is important to keep those close to us informed of where we are that impacts our Relationship with them. And also treats them with the same Respect we each wish for ourselves, and upholds established Trust placed in each of us by another with which we are committed. Again Honest Open Communication, not Always easy, but Always Always necessary.

Many things in each Relationship a person has is specific to That Relationship, and fairly personal between Them. I don't need to know every detail, or the he saids she saids, and a play by play detailed explanation of their moments together, and such. And which many times those things are simply TMI, as well as Truly have nothing to do with me.

My bottom line on these things is as stated; 1) If it impacts my Relationship with my Partner in some way 2) If something has occured or is wished for that will require Re-Negotiation between my Partner and I, That is all I really Need To Know.

Respectfully~SidheWolf

[jeanne]

My bottom line on these things is as stated; 1) If it impacts my Relationship with my Partner in some way 2) If something has occured or is wished for that will require Re-Negotiation between my Partner and I, That is all I really Need To Know.

Respectfully~SidheWolf

This is where I am with it also. I think the difficulty comes in when I am chatting with her and she tells me something about her interactions with Him that causes some of those emotions to arise. Just plain ole jealousy usually - but that is becoming a non-issue as we grow in this. I have expressed my desire to not hear 'details' after realizing that was a problem for me, and that request is being respected by both of them.

It's just a matter of learning, thinking, communicating...and making mistakes sometimes, which is the best teacher of all.

[sidhewolf]

This is where I am with it also. I think the difficulty comes in when I am chatting with her and she tells me something about her interactions with Him that causes some of those emotions to arise. Just plain ole jealousy usually - but that is becoming a non-issue as we grow in this. I have expressed my desire to not hear 'details' after realizing that was a problem for me, and that request is being respected by both of them.

It's just a matter of learning, thinking, communicating...and making mistakes sometimes, which is the best teacher of all.

<nods> Though you have mentioned the "distance" between yourself and Sir Ozme. So maybe it's not Really jealousy, but more Envy? Definitions that come to mind now are;

Jealousy= The belief or feeling that someone else has something that belongs to oneself.

Envy= The desire to have something someone else has.

So maybe even a bit of each?

It's quite natural for Friends to discuss things they are into. And since this other person is also your Friend, must be a little tough on her not to be able to share some things with you now, that were it not Sir Ozme she's interacting with, she would be able to? At the same time it's great that you've identified your own triggers to your discomfort, and have addressed them And set some Bounderies. Which are being Respected. And that's also great I think

You and Sir Ozme have been together a while now, and been through a lot. I have every confidence in the Both of You that Ya'll will Both Learn and Grow as You go . Anything worth having takes Time and Work. And Ya'll seem to be doing it

Huggs to You Both, and Brightest of Blessings.

Respectfully~SidheWolf