Quote Originally Posted by jeanne View Post
Keeping vital information to ourselves, and then placing ourselves in a situation that could cause some unexpected consequences, is an awful thing to do.
That's life. Ain't it grand? Things like that aren't always done on purpose, and even if you do give some information, it doesn't mean people listen. For instance, at a birthday dinner with friends, the subject of paddles came up. I know I distinctly said that I didn't like them....several times. It was not the time or place to go into why. Unbeknownst to me, one was commissioned by Voodoo from my friend's husband. We went to their house one evening. We had some drinks. The subject came up again. I again said I didn't care for them. I then discovered that there was one "with my name on it" so to speak. I freaked!

I never got to see that paddle...or my friend's paddle....or my friend's red ass. There was no play that night. What did I do that was so awful? Not go into gory detail about childhood abuse at the dinner table in the middle of Ruby Tuesday on my birthday? Not know that my warnings about my dislike of paddles would be ignored? Not be grateful that Voodoo had tried to surprise me?

I wasn't able to watch, even though I consented. They would not consent to let me see if I could handle just watching. As many times as I've been to the dungeon, I've never seen a paddling. I guess I've just been lucky. I've always warned potential play partners that I seem to have a phobia, so I have yet to try it myself. I won't inflict my hysterics on a casual acquaintance. I won't try paddles with "strangers" without telling, not because I don't think it's abusive (because I don't think it is) but because of pride. I like to be confident that I can handle what's being dished out. I don't give people my background before we play. They don't need to know. All they need to know is that I don't like paddles, and they better not hit my pussy. If they ever choose to ignore that, they're responsible for the consequences.