Quote Originally Posted by nawteeone View Post
I often just think about how you get one chance to live the best life possible,
But you do get many chances to make your life better, in small ways, all the time. Working to improve your marriage can be one of them, but so can working on your career, your children, other family members, your friends, even your house. Even just finding a hobby that you love. Finding happiness in other areas of your life can help boost you up to handle the areas that aren't so great, so don't give up on improvement just yet.

and in a few areas, I have screwed up big time.
I believe firmly that every single one of us can say that...

It makes me sad. I do blame myself for a lot of the problems in my marriage. I used to be a bit of a doormat, and honestly didn't think that my needs were important. It's not DH's fault that I have outgrown that over time.
You've matured and changed as a person. That's wonderful! Even though adjusting to the "new you" might be difficult for him (and you), maybe as you both get used to you being more outspoken it will improve things in the end. Only if both of you can communicate, of course!

Anyway, the reality is I effed up, and will have to live with this situation for a long time. I know that MOST people aren't living the life they want, and understand that doesn't make me unique. Trust me, I get up everyday and put on my big girl pants and deal with the life I DO have in the best way I can.
Good for you. Keep it up!