Humilation Debate

[_ID_]

Humiliation, as stated is all in the mindset, as stated. That being said. As a Dominant, to find what a submissive feels is humiliating and still a turn on, that is something I would use. To use something that debases them, and serves no other purpose other than to insult them, and get no excitement or benefit from it. That version of humiliation would or could be characterized as abuse.

Since the question/debate was geared towards humiliation rather than pain. I figured I would take a look at different reasons one would find different activities that are humiliating, something that a person would enjoy.

Sexual humiliation is very open ended. Broadly it can be divided into verbal, and physical aspects. Verbal aspects might include:

* Verbal belittlement, such as "slave", "boy", "girl", "missy", "pet".
* Insults and verbal abuse, such as "fat", "ugly", "stupid", "worthless".
* Degrading references such as "slut", "tart", "bitch", "faggot" and "whore".
* Slighting of body parts or behaviors, such as disparaging or cruel references to breasts, facial appearance, genitalia or genital size, bottom, and slighting of mannerisms such as walking, responsiveness, standard of self-care.
* Having to ask permission for everyday activities such as toilet, or eating or spending money.
* Small penis humiliation, where scorn is addressed towards the supposed inadequacy of the male's genitals or his inability to please a woman (and by implication his essential worthlessness as a man and his penis becomes an object of play for the woman).
* Forced repetition, such as being obliged to repeat back commands to confirm them.
* Mockery and ridicule.

Physical and tangible aspects might include:

* Ejaculating or urinating on the bottom's body or, especially, the face.
* Performance of menial tasks.
* Detailed accountability and control (micro-management) as to time spent or activities done, including list of jobs to do, precise directions as to how the housework is to be performed, exactly how to act and behave, and so on.
* Specific rituals and affectations to be adopted. This includes displays of subservience, such as lighting cigarettes, walking a pace behind the dominant, only speaking when spoken to, kneeling or eating after others, low status place to sleep, etc.
* Roleplaying "lower status" beings such as animals or babies (see human animal roleplay and adult baby play).
* Spanking, restraint or other BDSM activities.
* Prohibitions or restrictions on clothing, or (for men) feminizing, cross dressing and/or sissification.
* Use of chastity belts or other means of erotic sexual denial.
* Wearing of external signs of "ownership" such as a collar.
* Having friends, family or strangers aware of or witnessing one's treatment (i.e.: public humiliation).
* Erotic objectification, where the bottom is cast in the role of an object.
* Embarrassment.

Some sexual humiliation involves inflicting pain but much of it is far more concerned with ridicule, mocking, degradation and embarrassment.

I highlighted those items that I felt were in the abuse category. Even though I felt that way. There are others who find that activity to be a huge turn on.

So why would anyone enjoy being humiliated by being urinated/ejaculated on? Some people find that activity to fall into an objectification area. What about having your small penis or tits made fun of? That would go towards your need to please your Dominant, for them to find pleasure in your appearance. Or what about some activities that fall into the ritualistic category? Things such as not being able to sleep in your Dominants bed with them, or eating from a dog dish? These activities are demeaning and debasing, yet some people find them to be a rather large turn on. I think the reason for that is that when they are allowed to do sleep in bed with their Dom/me or eat at the table. It means they have been good, and have pleased their Dom/me.

So why the difference in preference between men and women (in general terms)? Perhaps it is because women tend to be more concerned about their own self image more than men do. For example, the loaded question a woman will give her significant other "do these pants make my butt look fat?". Guys don't ask those kinds of questions. Guys don't wear make up (normally). Guys (normally) don't have 30 pairs of shoes to match every shirt he owns.

Perhaps it's due to the idea that a good portion of male submissives see a female dominant in a maternal role. The need to be pleasing for mommy, and yet being degraded and humiliated even still.

Since I am not submissive, I can't really give a good submissive perspective.

V/R
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